As my time in Kenya is coming to end, I self reflect. Remembering back to the day at the airport when my parents dropped me off, crying uncontrollably as I made my way through security. I knew my tears stemmed from fear and doubt. Can I really do this, will I really be able to live in Africa? As I waved goodbye to my parents and watched them turn to walk out, I cried a bit harder. I knew in that moment I only had myself to rely on, it was in a matter of seconds I had to grow up. Panic once again met up with me in London when I was told my flight to Nairobi has been canceled, " I'm sorry today Virgin is not flying to Kenya." "Stay calm," I told myself, "I'll figure this out." And so within an hour I had a new flight to Kenya on Kenya Airways, and a part of me thought, "Maybe after all I can do this." Two weeks into my journey I knew I was "safe," keeping in mind what everyone told me, "The first two weeks will be the hardest and if you get past that you'll be fine." So I settled in and made Kenya my home and it welcomed me with open arms. And over the past couple months I listened, watched, and embraced. I listened to everything that was being said, I watched everything around me and I opened my mind and my heart to country that has seen so much pain, yet is one of the happiest and warmest places I have ever been. The children, the beautiful children, are the leaders of tomorrow and the future of a better world. The youth, I have no doubt will lead this country to nothing but success with a passion for change. The men and women of the older generations keep tradition close and remind us to stay close to our roots. This country is nothing short of a miracle, a place that will have a piece of my heart forever, a place where we could all learn from, and a place that I now call home. Leaving will be one of the hardest things I'll ever have to do, but know that I will return only to learn more.
with a little piece of my heart,
Julia
My Dearest Julia,
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking back to the night before you left. Your bags were almost packed, all you clothes sprayed with the poison they told us you needed on your clothes to protect you from ticks, bugs and gd only knows what else! You had gotten all those shots to protect you from the diseases that you could possibly gotten. Your mosquito net was the last to be packed, we finally got the duffel zipped and you were ready, except for the panic attack that was just starting. I appeared very calm to you and just keep saying, this is something you have dreamed about for a long time and you could do it. But inside (I am admitting it now) I had my doubts about you actually getting on that plane. I think that was one of the reasons I was crying so hard when you went through security, yes I was going to miss you and worry about you, but at that moment I knew you were going through with your dream of teaching in Africa! It has not been easy for you, I know with being sick, bitten, and covered with ticks, yet you seemed to take it all in stride (except one day in the hospital) and got through it all! I can't put into words how proud dad and I are! You started with a dream and now Kenya will be your second home, and we are counting the minutes until you come home.
We love you so much
Dad and I
There are few classes in school that teach the life lessons we learn independently after "leaving the nest." I have such respect and high regard for your journey to Kenya -- and not just because you have fulfilled your initial dream of teaching children in Africa.
ReplyDeleteThere is something else that you have accomplished. For lack of better words, dearest Julia, you spat in the face of self-doubt, uncertainty, fear, and trepidation. You made friends with the fact that it is okay to move out of your "comfort zone" even though it might be frightening. In doing so successfully, you have achieved monumental personal growth.
Not only did you fly away from the nest, but you flew TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FREAKING WORLD! And once you left Los Angeles, you flew straight forward, without hesitation, to find the path on your journey and accomplished every goal you had planned for the trip -- and then some.
Now, you have two homes. That makes you "bi-coastal." ;-) And the people on either side will always miss you dearly when you leave, and will rejoice when you return -- because everywhere you go, you bring sunshine to darkness and help to build rainbows for those that are caught in a storm.